In this talk, made while I was walking the Campbell Creek Trail in Anchorage, Alaska, I talk about my experiences with bipolar anger and rage. These emotions, exaggerated by my illnesses, have been huge issues over the years. There have been many times over the years that my emotions have gotten out of control. In one instance, I was so angry and so filled with rage, that I actually wished harm to come to another human being. This woman is a very bad person, but that’s really no excuse for wishing harm to come to her, and the angry fantasies I had about her don’t make me proud. I’m healthier now, but for a long time, I responded to life situations that I didn’t like with inappropriate anger and rage. I routinely sent angry emails to anyone who was willing to listen to me, and I also routinely yelled at people who pissed me off. I remember one instance, which I didn’t mention in the video, of yelling at the power company over the phone because I was getting outrageous bills due to an electrical problem in the apartment I was living in. And I couldn’t get them to believe that there was a problem so they would troubleshoot it and fix it. It was extremely frustrating, but I chose anger over other more constructive ways to deal with the issue.
Anyway… I hope this video helps you to understand bipolar anger and rage. It’s not a pleasant subject to address, but it needs to be discussed.